Things I Like About MORNINGS!

See below for my list:









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Still thinking -









Ummmmmmmmm..........See below:









I like..........................(almost).........
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Sorry - See above!

WHISTLING

Do you whistle?
Can you whistle?
How often do you whistle?
It would seem that WHISTLING has become somewhat
of a "lost art", don't you think? When was the last time
that you whistled? When did you last hear someone
whistle? How often do you hear whistling?
While minding the cash register at Rite Aid recently,
I heard a "gentleman" whistling as he exited the store.
My assumption is that he was having a good day?
Does anyone whistle when they're sad? What tune
would you whistle when you're "down"?
A decades-old song talks about "whistle a happy
tune, and no one will suspect that I'm afraid!".
Some have been accused of "whistling in the dark".
There are whistles of flirtation - "wolf whistles".
Whistles of relief - "Whew"!
Some call their dogs or other animals with a
whistle. Maybe there's a "horse whistler"?
Some beckon their children with whistles.
I heard a radio commentator and his crew note
that Barry "whistles" when he talks without the
assistance of his teleprompter, giving the idea
of uncertainty or misrepresentations when he
talks impromptu. Huh?
Santa whistled to his team.
Teapots "whistle" when they're done doing
their thing.
Are you in "inny" or "outy" when you whistle?
Some can whistle both ways, taking air in or
forcing it out through their front teeth.
If you'll remember to listen, many professional
entertainers have either whistled or had a
whistler complement their musical arrangements.
Roger Whittaker. Fred Lowery. Bing Crosby in his
famous "White Christmas" song. Les Paul. Neil Sedaka
on Pat Boone's "Love Letters In the Sand". Billy Joel
at the start and end of "The Stranger". Al Jolson
(who's he? careful, you'll date yourself) in his
famous "Toot, Toot, Tootsie, Goodbye". And, of
course, Otis Redding's "Sittin' On The Dock Of The Bay".
Finally, Brother Bones' well-known and still being
played regularly "Sweet Georgia Brown", theme song
of the Harlem Globetrotters.
You can attend a "whistlers'" convention!
You can find "whistlers" websites!
Happy? WHISTLE! Afraid? WHISTLE!
For those who find it hard to play a musical
instrument other than a radio or CD player, God
has given you a natural talent - WHISTLING!
Let me hear you blow a note or two.....Good!
Try hard, you can do it.
Let's bring back whistling, what say?
We may even start to see more smiling faces when
they hear us whistle - even though we're not
particularly adept at it.
I'm even going to suggest to our minister that
we "whistle" a hymn or worship chorus in church
some Sunday soon. Huh? Why not?

THE INESTIMABLE VALUE OF A SMILE

SMILE! You've heard that before, haven't you?
Those cute little yellow smiley-faces remind us
to increase our "face value" by turning up the
corners of our mouths into those becoming
looks of a SMILE!
Think about it. SMILES have a way of warming
up the heart of the person(s) you are smiling at.
It makes them to think things like, "He's happy
to see me!", or "She likes me despite what I said
about her the other day!", or "I must be somebody
to someone, else why would I be getting a SMILE?".
You never know what a SMILE can do - how much
of a difference or how powerful it can be for the
person receiving one!
How do you feel when someone SMILES AT YOU?
Good. Warm. Welcomed. Accepted. Friendly.
Appreciated. Liked. Loved. Pretty? Handsome?
You can never be totally sure of the power of the
SMILE that you are giving another, whether a
friend, acquaintance, neighbor, family member,
coworker, or stranger.
It's been said and proven that fewer muscles are
needed/employed in SMILING than in FROWNING!
It's more relaxing and less stressful to SMILE!
Perhaps the person that you're giving a SMILE to
is having a bad day (or a bad life), your little
contribution to their day or life may just spur
him or her on to continue to face the challenge
or challenges that they're experiencing!
A SMILE is disarming! It can break down any
social or hostile feelings that another may have.
It may say "I forgive you." Or...."I like you in
spite of yourself." Or...."My heart is reaching out
to you." Or..."I'm glad to see you out and about."
CAN YOU THINK OF OTHER BENEFITS? I'm sure
you can. How do you feel when someone SMILES
at you? Not that phony, "I have to smile because
we're face-to-face.", but that "I acknowledge and
affirm you because you're a fellow traveler."
SMILES relay a sense of wellbeing! SMILES pass
along a feeling of acceptance! SMILES can cause
an almost automatic response that creates goodwill
in the recipient! SMILES can be healing, however
temporary! SMILES can be that extra nudge that
a person needs to help them carry on!
SO WHATYASAY, READY TO JOIN THE "SMILE
CLUB"? Give a few SMILES out today, they won't
cost you anything, and the return can be
INVALUABLE!!
I'M SMILING AT YOU RIGHT NOW!!
THANKS FOR SMILING BACK, YOU'VE MADE ME
FEEL GOOD. Love, Bill

P.S. Every now then when someone SMILES at
me it makes me wonder, "Is my hair out of place?"
Or...."Is my zipper open?" Or...."Is my tie straight?"
Or..."Do I have a booger hanging out of my nose?"
HA-HA, MADE YOU SMILE!

MY NEW YEAR'S WISHES

Well, here we are on the fifth day of 2010 - how
many of your resolutions have you "blown" already?
Not funny, is it?
It's not too late, or early to try again - just make a
few practical and attainable goals - you'll most
likely succeed if you don't aim too high!
SPEAKING OF AIMING HIGH, here are some
"wishes" for the "not-so-new" new year:
For New England's Bill "Belicheat" to get a job
in a funeral home - where the other "stiffs" are!
For Rush Limbaugh to quit swearing - he can
get his messages across otherwise - except that
he gets so riled up, it's hard not to swear! Huh?
No wonder he had chest pains - the weight of
being the VOICE OF CONSERVATISM is heavy!
For Pittsburgh to become even more "The
Most Livable City", an honor that it has gotten
often in recent years.
For global warming to become a reality - I hate
the cold! Can't it snow in 50-plus temps?
For a newspaper or sponsor somewhere to
"discover" my creative talents and support me
in the manner I wish to live. Huh?
For Troy Polamalu to have a complete recovery
and come back stronger, faster, and better than
ever, if that's possible. (See my sports blog).
For Osama Bin Laden to find a "final resting
place", so we can honor him in the custom that
he deserves - HELLFIRE!
For all terrorists to have the same "success"
that the Christmas Day "splomber" had - does
the word FIZZLE mean anything to you?
For all liberals to GET A BRAIN and GET A
HEART to think about others and not just
themselves!!
For me to "hit the lottery" so that I can help
so many people (me, first, of course!). I just
gotta remember to play. Duh.
For all truth-speaking Gospel-delivering churches
to be full for every service!
For a cure for cancer, heart disease, leukemia,
malaria, dementia (personal request), H1N1,
colds, and all other debilitating maladies.
For the "conservatives", including but not
excluding Republicans, to be able to know
what their message is, and to be able to make
it understandable and desirable to voters and
Americans as a whole. Do we need a new or
another party?
LAST, BUT NOT LEAST, for knowledge, insight,
wisdom, and speaking/writing ability for all
patriotic American spokespeople to "catch the
imagination" and attention of our citizens.
I'M IN YOUR CORNER, AND HOPEFULLY IN
YOUR CONSCIENCE, TOO!

Ode To Winter

I love Winter, don't you? There's so much to like
about this special season. In fact, it's my fourth
favorite season! A part of the reason that I love
Winter is because it comes just before Spring -
one of my top three seasons!
There is so much to enjoy in the Winter - slipping
and sliding on the roadways, "frosted window panes"
on your car in the morning, and sometimes even
in the afternoon or evening!
I love the sight and sound of those Winter tires
on my vehicle! How manly! They just look like
they could "take a bite out of the roadway", don't
they?
Ever do a "doughnut"? They're fun, at least if
you're in an vacant parking lot or large piece of
road with no other drivers around! Wheeeeee!
Of course, it's not so much fun when your car or
truck spins out of control - although the experience
does somewhat remind you of a carnival ride!
Using ice scrapers and snow brushes gives me a
sense of accomplishment - removing those nasty
elements that would hamper my progress and
views. I'll show them who's boss!
As for dead batteries on very cold mornings,
I need to have some use for those jumper cables
that just lay around in the trunk for months without
any purpose. And then, what good is my AAA
membership if I don't call them once or twice at
least each Winter for tows, jumps, a new battery
or something related?
Shoveling snow is good exercise - just be sure to
check with your cardiologist before trying it. And
those pain pills in your cupboard or medicine
cabinet are waiting for you to "pop" two or three
so you'll be "good as new" soon. Huh?
Winter necessitates special lip care, as they get
chapped so easily and often from the cold. I like
the "cherry" flavored balm, myself, to get away
from that medicinal smell and taste of the "regular"
tubes.
To me, shivering is a kind of season ritual dance!
At my advanced age I dare not try any of those steps
that the "Stars" do, so shivering is my way of dancing
to the temperatures of that special season - Winter!
And who doesn't enjoy watching the Winter Olympics
every four years on television? At least we get to
do so in the warmth and comfort of our living rooms.
Winter brings the sights, sounds, lights, and smells that
are peculiar to this time of year - brightly colored bulbs
on lamp posts and around windows, Christmas carols
and wintry songs being played over mall and city
sidewalk speakers, and most excitedly, the aromas of
baked goodies and those turkeys or other delicacies in
the oven for our meals' main courses! Yum, Yum!
Crammed-full parking lots are a joy, as are stores and
malls with "cheek-to-cheek" shoppers! Talk about
fun! Jostling, bumping, crashing packages and shopping
bags, waiting in lines at the registers - Who could want
more excitement in their lives?
I get especially excited when I get up to go pee in the
middle of the night and there's a "chill" in the air!
The blankets feel so warm and "friendly" when I
go back to bed!
Winter is great, too, for testing one's dexterity and
reflexes as we attempt to traverse uncleared walkways
and parking areas. And......don't you just feel so "warm
and fuzzy" when you put on those layers of clothing?
It's like getting "giant hugs" from your inner and
outerwear! Wool socks, hats, gloves, scarves, heavy
coat (my Rite Aid black leather coat), earmuffs, and
we're ready for the Arctic, hey?
Think about this, too - Winter means no lawn mowing,
no trimming, no weeds to pull or chemicals to apply to
our "greenest lawn in the neighborhood"! Take a
break, sit back, relax, and enjoy the season - the grass
and weeds will be back - maybe sooner than you want
them to be? Huh?
If birds could talk, they'd tell you why they love Winter -
it's because they get to go SOUTH until temps go
back up in our clime! Of course, we do have our share
of human "snowbirds" who do that very same thing -
don't you despise them? Why should they get to go
where it's warmer and leave us to "guard the
neighborhood"? It's not fair. That is unless you
really DO enjoy Winter, and if that's the case -
I'm worried about you.

Additional Honors For Mr. Obama

In the light of the recently-awarded, capricious, and
dubious, so-called "Peace Prize", I offer additional
awards that the recipient of the aforementioned may
be given:
l. Alfred E. Neuman Look-Alike Award
Prize: Side-by-side portrait of both individuals.

2. Empty Promise Award
Prize: A plastic, fake-crystal bowl (empty, of course)

3. Foreign Citizen Of the Centuries
Prize: A framed copy of his Kenyan birth certificate

4. Air Miles Champion Award
Prize: Free trip of his choice to any Arab/Muslim country.

5. Chicago's Ambassador To The World
Prize: Bus trip to Chicago, tour of "The Loop", a ride
on the "El", dinner at George Soros's.

6. Al Gore "Hot Air" Global Warming Prize
Prize: A ride in a "hot air" balloon over the polar icecap.

7. Most Outstanding Kenyan Award
Prize: A grass hut playhouse for his daughters.

8. Hide 'n' Seek Personal Documents Award
Prize: Brass heart of a lion (lyin').

9. Public Smoker-Of-The-Year
Prize: All of the cigarettes or cigars he can smoke
or his choice of patches or gum deterrents.

10. Absentee-Senator-Of-The-Decade
Prize: His slightly-used senate seat from Congress
to display in the Oval Office.

11. "Lefty-Of-The-Year"
Prize: A cast of his LEFT hand. (Get it?)
(He IS "lefthanded", you know!?)

12. Fox News MVP Award
Prize: A bronze fox to place on his mantel.

13. "Mr. Transparency" Prize
Prize: An engraved, dark, smoked-glass mirror.

14. Friend Of Arabs & Muslims Honor
Prize: A turban in his choice of colors.

15. "Amigo & Amiga" Award
Prize: Rosetta Stone's "Spanish" on DVD,
taught by illegals in exchange for amnesty, healthcare, etc.

16. Bush-Basher-Of-The-Decade
Prize: A "Pin-The-Blame-On-George W." game,
complete with poster and darts.

17. Socialist-Masquerading-As-An-American Honor
Prize: (dual prizes) - a rusty iron statue of Marx,
Lenin, and himself, AND his picture and name next
to the word "socialist" in all dictionaries and
encyclopedias.

18. LIBERAL of the Liberals Award
Prize: A lifesized portrait of Nancy Pelosi, Harry
Reid, and himself to hang in his bathroom.

WELL? Can you think of others? I've just begun, and
probably won't address this subject again, as there are
many other humorous sides of life to enjoy. THANKS
for reading, and stay tuned for more in the days ahead.