Saturday, September 10, 2011

PART 4 & FINAL (FINALLY) OF "THINGS OBAMA COULD DO TO MAKE ME HAPPY"

I KNOW, I KNOW, WHERE WILL IT EVER END?
I DON'T KNOW.  JUST WHEN I THINK "I'VE DONE
ENOUGH", MORE "BRAINSTORMS" ATTACK MY
ALREADY BESIEGED MIND.  GOT TO STOP THIS
"MADNESS" NOW, AS THERE ARE MORE IMPORTANT
THINGS TO APPLY MYSELF TO.

HERE GOES!  READY?  NO LAUGHING OR CHUCKLING!

1.  GET A CLUE.

2.  TELL US YOUR FAVORITE CHAIRMAN MAO QUOTE.

3.  BE A CONTESTANT ON "ARE YOU SMARTER THAN
     A FIFTH GRADER"!

4.  GO OVER NIAGARA IN A BARREL.

5.  WHAT IS THE "DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE"?

6.  WHAT KIND OF MUSIC DO YOU LIKE?  (I'm guessing
     it's The Blues, because that's what you're "playing" for us!)

7.  SAY, "I LOVE AMERICA".

8.  PRACTICE "SAFE SEX".  We don't need any more Obamas.

9.  IF YOU CHANGED YOUR NAME, WHAT WOULD YOU
     CALL YOURSELF?  I have some suggestions.

10.  WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE QUOTE FROM KARL MARX?

11.  DO YOU PLAY AN INSTRUMENT?  NO, NOT THAT ONE,
       I MEAN A "MUSICAL" INSTRUMENT!

12.  DO YOU ATTEND FAMILY REUNIONS, OR ARE TOO
      MANY OF YOUR RELATIVES HIDING OR IN JAIL?

13.  EXPLAIN THIS QUOTE:  "FERTILIZER HAPPENS".
      Yeh, but 4 years of it?

14.  HOW DOES IT FEEL TO BE "THE GREATEST MUSLIM
      PRESIDENT AMERICA HAS EVER HAD"?

15.  DO YOU SIT TO PEE?

16.  AFTER YOU LEAVE OFFICE IN 2013, HOW LONG WILL
       IT BE UNTIL "OBAMALAND" AMUSEMENT PARK
      OPENS?  Where will it be, Kenya?

17.  WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SAYING OF LENIN'S?

18.  HOW MANY HABIBS & BURQAS DO YOU AND
       MICHELLE HAVE?  Which one is your favorite color?

19.  BE A GUEST ON "HILLBILLY HAND-FISHING".

20.  NAME ANY ARTICLE OF THE U.S. CONSTITUTION.

21.  HOW MANY COPIES OF THE KORAN DO YOU OWN?

22.  WHICH MOSQUE DO YOU TITHE TO?

23.  GIVE US A FAVORITE QUOTE OF STALIN'S.

24.  DO YOU KNOW SIGN LANGUAGE?  GUESS WHAT
      "SIGN" MOST AMERICANS ARE GIVING YOU NOW.

25.  DID YOU KNOW THERE'S A CANDY BAR NAMED
       AFTER YOU?  IT'S THE "ZERO'" BAR!

26.  TELL US HOW MANY STROKES YOU'VE TAKEN
       OFF OF YOUR GOLF AVERAGE IN YOUR 80+
      GAMES SINCE TAKING OFFICE.

27.  TELL US WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR AND
       MICHELLE'S LAW LICENSES.

28.  DO YOU WASH YOUR FEET BEFORE TAKING
      OFF YOUR SHOES TO PRAY?

29.  AND FINALLY..............SHUT UP!

30.  ..............................AS ALWAYS, I LEAVE THE
      "LAST WORD" FOR YOU, MY FAITHFUL AND
       BELOVED READER.       

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